Things men have said to me since I started my business

Since launching my illustration business, the influx of support has encouraged me, the influx of praise has touched me, and the influx of men I barely (or don’t) know has bemused me.

Before I started branding myself online, I barely used social media. A few times a month, I’d get a creepy message on LinkedIn or Facebook from a stranger asking “to be friends and see where it takes us, my angel,” but that was it. Fairly common to most womenfolk of the interwebs, an easily blockable scammer at worst.

However, my foray into professional Instagram has led to a whole new species of male attention: that of the generous gentleman benefactor. They’re more real. I can’t be rude, because I’m vaguely connected to them through a gregarious auntie or alma mater. I can’t be rude, because they think they’re genuinely nice and normal. I can’t be rude, because I’ll look like an ungrateful, egoistical, up-herself, prissy bitch. (Warning: I’m not going to censor the language. If I have to read it, I’m taking you all down with me.)

Some of my favourite messages have been transcribed or paraphrased in the gif above, but I wanted to share a few choice exchanges in full. Together, we can pick them apart like it’s an A-level English class where we analyse the work of an overconfident man who thinks he’s God’s gift to civilisation.

The Angel Investor